Tie-dyed snowman

Here we still are: stuck inside for going on a week, driving each other a bit more insane than we usually do. Outside, the snow has turned the color of dirty dishwater and the black ice lies in wait. Miss Crankypants is ready to claw down the blinds and make a break for it.
When you think about it, cabin fever is exactly what our future astronuts will experience as they rocket off to Mars and places beyond. Miss CP wouldn’t want to be trapped in a phone booth with any guy who hasn’t bathed or shaved in eighty-five years. Even that Duck Dynasty chick must force those dudes into the shower now and again.
Here, we aren’t only dealing with long-in-the-tooth grumps who hog all the cocoa. No, Miss Cranky is going bonkers trying to convince Mr. Crankypants and Junior that they’re not going to die if they get out there and shovel the walk. Being from Southern California, Mr.CP has no idea what to do with the White Stuff. And Junior loves to talk. Miss CP MUST get these dudes out of the cabin before a murderous fever holds her hostage and she tapes Junior’s mouth shut!
Locking them outside sounds a little too extreme, right? After all, half the folks Miss CP knows have frozen pipes. But dagnabit, these guys are making Miss Crankypants utterly crazy! We’ve already made a zillion snow angels, snowmen, snowballs and snow ice cream. We’ve swapped stories of sliding around icy corners, turning donuts in the 7-11 parking lot and spinning the wheels every time a light turns green. We have taken turns standing at the window, muttering, “Wow it’s really snowy out there!”
And we are officially SICK OF IT.
There. You’ve been wondering exactly what CRANKYTUDE is? Well, Miss Cranky believes that we become a lot more grateful AFTER we gripe. Cranky + Gratitude = CRANKYTUDE! And boy do we have it.
SO: Give us back our gray skies, our Oregon drizzle, our puddles that meet in the middle of the street. We long for muddy footprints (and pawprints) across a clean kitchen floor. We are running dangerously low on cocoa.
If that’s not cabin fever, Miss Crankypants doesn’t know what is.