|Bodhi loves corn!|
Miss Cranky is stunned. Upset. Outraged. A few days ago, the bank called to suggest fraudulent charges were showing up on the Crankypants account. Miss CP could hardly believe it. Why on earth would any self-respecting crook want to deplete her balance which was the royal sum of $66.00?
But there it was: Someone had used her Visa debit card to purchase $13.91 of KFC.
In NEW JERSEY. Kentucky Fried Chicken?
Why, Miss Cranky’s never traveled east of the Mississippi! And she hasn’t patronized a Kentucky Fried Chicken joint since a certain incident that took Extra Crispy off the menu.
So who could be licking their fingers on Miss Crankypants dime? Unfortunately, the bank said, this type of thing happens every day. The card was cancelled, and Miss Cranky wants to get out the word–You’re next.
The bank also claimed there is nothing you can do to prevent sides of mashed potatoes and biscuits from hopping onto your monthly statement. Twenty-four-seven, these crooks are running some evil computer program, looking for the next active debit card, salivating at the prospect of a bucket of Original Recipe warming their crooked little bellies.
Now you may be wondering why Miss CP no longer drives through at the Colonel’s restaurants. Well, even before they let criminals order the 10 piece bucket with HER debit card, she was bitter.
One evening, as she racked up a bill in a local KFC, she gleefully ordered a bucket and plenty of sides, including corn on the cob. All the way home,secret spices wafted through the car. She drooled at the thought of sinking her teeth into a crisp golden ear of yummy sweet corn.
Alas and alack. At home, the whole Cranky clan dug into the BUCKET, fighting over crispy and original recipe as if their lives depended on it. Then, someone shouted, “Corn! They didn’t give us our corn!”
Nobody was very hungry after that, except maybe for Melchior the Very Large, who mewed, “Are you going to finish that?”
Thus began a total KFC boycott, one that lasted until this week, when those creeps in New Jersey used our card to buy KFC. No doubt they got THEIR corn. Thirteen dollars and ninety-one cents worth. What is this world coming to?
Miss CP advises everyone to check the bank account daily. You never know when idiots in New Jersey are going to get a hankering for KFC.