Ever notice how writers have a secret language no one else understands? Miss Crankypants thinks there should also be a secret writer handshake.We’d all meet other writers, give the secret shake and the jargon would begin.
Writer 1: “Hey, how’s your WIP coming along?
Writer 2: Not bad but my crit partners say I’m using too many lys to keep my prose tight.
Writer 1: Hmm. Are you satisfying your readers’ need for WIIFM?
Writer 2: (shrugs) Don’t know about that–but I do need to R.U.E.
Writer 1: I keep telling you–show! As long as your piece has a great hook, it doesn’t matter so much, right?
Writer 2: Yeah, I queried and then forgot we don’t use SASES anymore. Everything’s online.
Writer 1: But I heard you got a contract! When’s your release?
Writer 2: (heavy sigh) Next year. I’m happy, but I’m also worried about my platform. What if I can’t get my network to buy enough books?
Writer 1: If you haven’t sold plenty, in a few months you’ll probably get the dreaded OOP letter.
Writer 2: (glances at the clock) OOPS! Gotta get back to that WIP.

If you don’t understand the above conversation, Miss Crankypants suggests you either haven’t been a writer for long or you are writing in a vacuum. Send Miss CP questions on Writer-speak and she will kindly refer you to any one of dozens of frustrated writers she knows personally.