A lot of writers begin by essentially putting their lives on the page. As they say, many first novels are at least partly autobiographical. But whom do you allow to see this writing? Or anything you write? It’s a question that intrigues me.
Writing Tip for Today: Some writers tell me their spouse or sig other read every word they write. Others shudder and say they never show their drafts to a loved one–at least not until after it’s published. Where do you stand on this question? I’d love to hear from you!
Think about these things as you decide whether to show or not to show:
- What Are You Looking For? Do you only need encouragement or do you trust this person to give you honest and constructive feedback? If you know your mom is always hyper-critical of what you create, then why subject yourself to this torture (unless Mom happens to be a bestselling author or an editor–and even then, whoa!)? My little opinion says that it may be better to surround yourself with objective readers.
- What’s Your Day-to-Day Relationship? You may be more likely to let your spouse read your stuff if you share everything but toothbrushes. Other couples have much more separate lives and wouldn’t think to be interested in hubby’s golf score any more than you’re concerned with his take on your writing. As Jimmy Kimmel’s says on the Capitol One commercial: It’s a lobster–either way.
- All the Fingers Point at You. Whatever your style, I think the whole idea is more about your needs as a writer than anything. Are you starved for some strokes? Give Sweet Mom a shot. Do you have a death wish?Let Toxic Mom read your raw stuff. We all crave an environment that helps you produce word count, take an objective look at your drafts and revise according to solid and practical advice. But never discount the person you’d most like to have praise your work. If that person is helpful and encouraging (as opposed to only being smarmy or dismissive), then share away. If you must approach that person with a ten foot pole, then beware. Your writer’s ego may be in danger.
I never have my husband read my manuscripts. We have a very close relationship, but my husband is not a fiction reader. What I really want from an early reader is constructive, and sometimes brutal, criticism. My goal is to improve. I could give my early pages to friends or family, but hearing, “Oh, that’s great!” isn’t going to push me to be better.
Great blog topic!
Thanks, Christina! I’m like you–my dear hubby hardly ever reads fiction and I want to improve, not get stroked. (Although strokes are some times good!)I know plenty of authors who work with their spouses, but I dounbt I could make it work. Thanks for your comment! ~Linda
Another hubby here who does not read fiction. He did, however, give me a great idea for some major conflict in the story I’m working on. 🙂 I’m not sure he read my nonfiction (Bible study) that I gave him, although he says he did.
Hi – new to your site here!
Well, I do not have a spouse or significant other so those aspects of your question are moot here. Sigh!
My devotional writings are submitted to the web site I write for so it is after the fact I get feedback – too late to improve but great to hear when any have encouraged the readers.
I am returning to work on a non-fiction manuscript and want to seek out a critique group for some more balanced feedback as I journey on with it. I will be checking that avenue out with the Writers’ Group I belong to as they do have critique groups.
It is a great question and topic – esp. got me to thinking how I write in such isolation because I live in isolation. I have not really thought about seeking out others to “read me” as work is in process. I am glad to be thinking in that direction. Thanks!
Welcome, Lynn! So glad you’ve joined us. Most of the time my posts are practical writing tips, so maybe you’ll find something uselful. Also, my humor blog, Miss Crankypants, posts on Tuesday and Thursday. Tune in for little rants about the writing life! Thanks for your comment! ~Linda
I am glad to find you!
Thinking through this question was helpful and I look forward to more to come, now that I am here.
A humor blog? What is not to like about that? I’ll be checking in! L.
Hi Linda,
Nice blog, I added you to my google reader.
My husband reads the books after they are published, during the process he is my sounding board for the male POV.
Wait…he did read the manuscript for We’re Not Blended We’re Pureed A Survivors Guide for Blended Families because I wanted him to have the chance to say, don’t put that in the book. It’s about our family written with a psychologist.I didn’t let my kids read it until it was in print.
Diana
http://www.dianabrandmeyer.com